While some parents find themselves in a rut, constantly telling their kids off and shouting, others take a more mindful approach to parenting.
Once the kids are asleep, after all the arguments, bribes, and shouting, many parents sit down for the first time all day and reflect. Those who take parenting seriously will ask themselves questions like “was I nice to my kids today?” “Did I empower them with my words today or weaken them?” While these are great questions, the answers are often a lot harder to come by.
Here are five tips parents can use to make sure they’re the best mommy or daddy they can be.
One of the most important things a parent can do is to give their kids healthy, positive messages on a regular basis. Statements like “You can always count on me in any situation,” “I’m so grateful to have you as my child,” and “To me, you are totally amazing – inside and out.” Statements like these, said to kids and teenagers as they mature, are the first vital step to positive parenting, and more importantly, to give kids confidence in their abilities. In turn, most kids and teens who get constant positive messaging from their parents go on to become functional and positive parents themselves in later years.
One of the hardest issues facing teens these days is the issue of low self-esteem. Low self-esteem affects boys and girls equally and is a terrible thing to live with. Possibly one of the most important things a parent can do for their kids is to fill them with a sense of high, healthy self-esteem and not to be down about themselves. Low self-esteem can be implanted into the minds of kids and teens if the right encouragement isn’t given to them. Without turning them into a “golden child,” honest and timely encouragement and compliments are the keys to ensuring a healthy upbringing for any child.
Another vital tip for good parenting is to stay positive with your kids, no matter what. Life is filled with trials and tribulations and is seldom an easy thing. The more positive you can keep things with your kids, the better. Words of encouragement, as mentioned in the previous tip, are vital as are positive vibes as often as possible. Little Jimmy failed his math test? Never mind, that new private tutor is going to help him out. Little Sarah didn’t make the lacrosse team? That’s alright; there are more trials next year. In other words, always attempt to keep a positive attitude when it comes to the hard times in life. Your kids will most likely take away the right messages to set them up for later in life.
Maintaining a secure connection with your kids is all-important. And while that sounds intuitive and logical, many parents inadvertently miss the mark with this. There are few things more empowering than keeping a strong connection with your kids, and that includes teenagers, no matter how much they are out or how much they rebel. Power struggles and arguments ensue when that strong and vital parent/child connection is broken or non-existent in the first place. Sit with your kids of an evening, interact with them, ask them about their day. Ask them to tell you three good things that happened that day. As you’ll soon see, the results are astounding.
In the modern era in which we live, life can get busy, very busy. Unfortunately, that often translates to a breakdown in communication between parents and their kids, and problems often spiral from there. No matter how hard you work or how much housework you do, making quality time available to spend with your kids is key to their healthy development into adulthood. Going for a walk in the park or nature or eating breakfast together daily without fail is a good place to start. Few things in life are more important than spending wholesome and quality time with your kids, no matter their age.